What's the news?
I... I... I haven't had more than about 181kg of Tequila byproduct ossifer. Officeser. Offiincisior. Sergeant. Honestly, barely a (hic) drop has passed my lips. It's all in the car you see.
Those nice people at Ford (lovely people, my best mates they are...) have come up with a wizard wheeze to use tequila bypridutcos. Byproduce. Tequila stuff to make plastic. You see, tequila (lovely stuff tequila, would you like a glass? No? Just me then.) is made from the Agave plant. Can't grow plants myself. They don't seem to like the Vodka.
Anyway, once you've roasted and mashed the Agave plant there's lots of it left over. Little fibre bits. Little little little bittys of fibre-y-stuff. Hello little fibre bits. Anyway, they can use those fibre-y bits for compost, or to make paper or, and this is the really clever bit, they can use to make plastic! And plastic makes bottles! And bottles mean more tequila!
Actually, they're going to use it to make bio-plastic to make bits and bobs for the cars. Heating controls, yes them. And those storage bins in the doors which are frequently just the right size for hiding a sneaky six-pack from your wife. I've heard.
"At Ford, we aim to reduce our impact on the environment," said Debbie Mielewski, Ford senior technical leader, sustainability research department. "As a leader in the sustainability space, we are developing new technologies to efficiently employ discarded materials and fibres, while potentially reducing the use of petrochemicals and light-weighting our vehicles for desired fuel economy.
"There are about 400 pounds [181kg] of plastic on a typical car," said Mielewksi. "Our job is to find the right place for a green composite like this to help our impact on the planet. It is work that I'm really proud of, and it could have broad impact across numerous industries." Well, she didn't say that to me. She said it to someone with a notebook who wrote it down and I read it later. And now I'm telling you. Or something.
"Jose Cuervo is proud to be working with Ford to further develop our agave sustainability plan," said Sonia Espinola, director of heritage for Cuervo Foundation and master tequilera. "As the world's No. 1-selling tequila, we could never have imagined the hundreds of agave plants we were cultivating as a small family business would eventually multiply to millions. This collaboration brings two great companies together to develop innovative, earth-conscious materials."
According to the Nations United (have I got that right) there is more than five-million metric tonnes of biomass waste produced each year and all of it can be used to make more tequila! I mean more car parts, which have a lower carbon cycle (does carbon ride bikes? News to me...) and are more friendly to the Earth.
I love the Earth. Love it. My best mate, the Earth...